So, it’s Monday morning, and I should have published a new blog post. I should have gotten up way before the kids to write because that’s when my mind is freshest. I should have made my morning smoothie right after dropping off the kids at school. I should be able to lose those 20(!!) pounds vicariously by watching YouTube videos of people exercising. I should stop shoulding on myself. Instead, I’m doing none of those things.
What I am doing is writing this post that I’ve started and scrapped about a dozen times and sitting at my usual cafe—which I haven’t frequented in months because I stopped drinking my favorite, dangerously estrogenic green tea soy latte in order to reclaim my health. In fact, all I’ve been able to focus on these last few months is getting my health and my body back into shape given that I’ve let those slide faster than I could guzzle a high-sugar frothing latte. Which I’m not drinking today, if you must know. I’m trying to down slowly sipping a plain green tea with no frills, in the smallest available size. (I ate cr*p for months, yet avoid caffeine. Go figure.)
So here’s what my life looked like for way too long to make excuses for it: no exercise, but for a couple of walks with my husband or with a friend over the weekend; no breakfast other than the aforementioned latte sans coffee (sometimes that was lunch too); almost no home-cooked food during the week…but really, hardly ever.
And how about the sheer volume of beauty bottles that are still awaiting photos, reviews, and a fair trial period as they dawdle away the days collecting dust while sitting prettily on my vanity, filling up my dresser drawers, and lining the bathroom cabinets and floor (yup, floor). My skin is crying, People! (And so is my husband who has furtively switched to another bathroom.) Yet these write ups must happen before filing away said beauty products for impromptu photo styling. (One never knows…)
Oddly, there is not a magical elixir among them that kicks a person into gear to right all the green transgressions and step into a better version of themselves, and there is really something wrong with that.
Sign me up for the magical elixir that aligns me with my true path. I need one now. Click To TweetThat picture does not make for a great clean living blogger, does it? The “Godmother of Green Beauty”—oh that delicious moniker!—caught eating Oreos on the sly? That won’t do, although those new thin Oreos are wickedly addictive. Bottle hoarding? There may be a fire hazard involved, let alone it’s hardly sustainable. What it does paint is the not-so-pretty image of a posturing green wannabe who uses way too many beauty products for her own good (at least those are clean, where the diet is lacking) and who should’s on herself as though it were the hottest trend.
Every day I’m faced with a ceremonial to-do list of should’s and have-to’s. Here’s what typically goes through my mind first thing Monday morning, after the two drop-offs at school by 7:30 and 8:15 a.m.:
“Wouldn’t it be nice to go back to sleep for a little? Nobody would ever know. Nope. Scratch that. There’s a mound of beauty products to organize.”
“Or wait! Maybe I should sit my butt down for an hour to finally answer those emails from a few weeks ago? Hmm…do I take a photo for the post I’m working on while the natural outdoor lighting is good?”
“Hold it! Hold it! I’ve got it. Eat first. But making that smoothie will take all morning… Let me juice a lemon, instead, and detox my liver. Oh man! Totally forgot to meditate.”
And so it goes.
When faced with overwhelm, it’s easier to casually wander over to Instagram and lose myself in the sheer volume of photos that warrant a double screen tap (that’s a “like” on IG), or jump onto Facebook to catch the latest nonsense thought-provoking content. I mean, I co-moderate a Facebook group, and I’m needed there, right? Let the brain-numbing begin while scrolling through the feed and stewing over vapid political commentaries. Allot extra time to add my two-cents in the comments. Who wouldn’t?
Here’s where the disclaimer comes in, and where I ask that you don’t find me ungrateful for all the work that has come my way since starting my blog in 2013. I am supremely grateful. It’s just that I can’t get to it all. Period. There really isn’t much to say after that.
I could tell you about the recent health scare that was the Universe’s funny way of telling me it was high time to step back into alignment with my priorities and with my message. I could tell you that every time I go on vacation with the family, returning to blogging gets harder since I recognize how quickly my kids are growing, and I don’t want to lose a minute of it. (My oldest is graduating high school this year and started driving. End sleep for, like, ever.) I could also mention that making smoothies, cooking whole food meals—and let’s face it, not skipping meals (bad girl!)—are its own full time job. And we haven’t even talked about squeezing into my clothes. (One hour exercise plus half hour shower plus travel time equals—oops!—whole day shot. Hence, why it has yet to happen.)
Did I mention that some days my kids need to be picked up early for dentists, orthodontists, regular chiropractic adjustments, and an assortment of other unpredictables?
But I won’t bore you with the details. Maybe they’re lame excuses to avoid the hours of writing, editing, stylizing instagram-worthy pics, answering emails, jumping on calls, and social media-ing (should be a verb, no?), though each one demands my attention. Maybe it’s my body’s way of seeking more offline moments and venturing into nature which I’m genuinely feeling called to do. Or maybe shifting back into alignment means that describing another skincare oil doesn’t have the same urgency in it that it used to. I’m destined for greater things than writing about a lip color, n’est-ce pas?
Either way, I know that I’m not the only blogger who faces overwhelming periods as they reconfigure their priorities, readjust their schedules due to the volume of requests, or get some support by way of an assistant, if that’s feasible, or delegating tasks to an intern. I can not imagine how bloggers juggle a full-time day job while running their blogs. But then again, being a mom and homemaker is a full time job, and sometimes I forget that. We bloggers can not do it all, though I do believe we can have it all. It merely takes time to figure out what having it all looks like. And if it’s worth it.
I’m still getting there. In the meanwhile, see you on Instagram.
So…. I was eating an oreo while reading this. I am not kidding. Maybe we were truly made for improv comedy?! I could write one of my novel of a responses to this post but instead, I will say that I don’t think we can have it all. However, we may be able to have some and we just have to decide what that some is.
Lol! I hope you didn’t cough up some of that cookie while you were eating it. I hear you on not having it all, but maybe it’s about seeing what exists and making that enough? In which case, we do have it all. It’s a bit of a head grind which may mean it’s totally off the mark. Anyway, I’m open to the possibility of having it all and of restoring balance in my daily life. Which does include an occasional Oreo cookie. 😉
Sarita i love your candid posts! I am always amaze at how you can juggle everything. And as much as you complain abt your skin, you have a beautiful skin….and a great disposition, and a blog full of insightful and valuable information. “But then again, being a mom and homemaker is a full time job, and sometimes I forget that. ” You are a mom, homemaker and wife, that’s more than a full time job!!. Dont burnout…we all need you ; )
Dear Nathalia, you are so kind!! Thank you so much for the encouragement and love. It means a great deal to me and I’m taking it to heart. Sending you a huge hug. Much love! XO
Hello Sarita, I know exactly what you are talking about. You dont need to explain or justify yourself. No post on Monday? it is ok! Don’t worry. We are still here too 🙂
x
You’re so cute, Audrey. Oh there have been plenty of weeks with no posts at all and no need to explain. I am grateful that you’re still here and reading my blog. Thank you!! <3 XO
Oh my gosh, Sarita. What a post!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ You’ll always be my queen of Green Beauty. This post was so real and honest. It won’t disappoint your beauty followers but just remind them of why they fell in love with you in the first place.
You’re a dolly, and I love you! Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts. It really does mean so much to me. That’s never a line. 😉 <3
truth sister. I’m right there with you..! You’re still the Godmother of Green Beauty to me! More now than ever 😉
Thank you, Janny!!! It’s so fun to have you visit my blog. You’re my godmother of green beauty too–and loads of other topics! XOXO
This post definitely resonated with me! Much of what you wrote describes exactly what I have been going through and I seriously wish there was a support group for overwhelmed/burnt out bloggers (maybe we start one? lol). My hubby and I just started a fitness program and trying to get the workouts in and plan meals (our trainer is having us focus on macros – 40/40/20) is seriously like a full-time job! So, trying to find a balance (or at least manage my time more efficiently) between everything is wearing me out. And I’m thinking about all the product reviews and posts I need to get to and I just want to watch Netflix instead. Also, oreos sound really good right now too! lol
Oh yes to Netflix! There’s a time and a place for entertainment too. I watch a lot of videos while cooking so I get to catch up on my daily inspo, when the kids aren’t swiping my computer. I’d love to read more about your fitness program. Have you written about it yet? I am not following any particular diet. It’s enough to make lots of veggies and whole foods minus the wheat (that’s a no-no) and most dairy. When I get used to this new schedule, I’ll keep you posted. I was cooking more at the start of my blog but got highly distracted by the pull of social media. XO P.S. Wanna come over for a late night Oreo’s party? LOL
You’re allowed to be human. A post like this is much more appreciated and needed then another one about why you shouldn’t roast with olive oil if the oven temp is over 400, gasp, a true greeny won’t do that. It’s great for us all to remember that we are all human and trying our best everyday and it’s brave of you to be honest. Sometimes that best is a clean home, completed work, fulfilled kids and a healthy dinner. Other times it’s a dirty house and piles of work. All that truly matters is that you’re trying and you’re fulfilling yourself! Thank you!
Amen, Aubrey! Here’s to ultimate fulfillment while keeping it together. Or somewhere on the see-saw in between. 😉 XO
Yes, take a break. A long break. The people, products will all still be there but your kids will continue to grow and taking care of yourself then your family comes first. And not just taking care of but enjoying them, that’s most important. We will always be here, there will always be a new product but these moments will pass so let go of the guilt and do your thing. It’s OK!!!
Yes it is ok, Karlie, you are totally right. It is always ok to take time for ourselves and return refreshed. I do it all the time without any special announcements. The funny thing is: nobody notices when I’ve disappeared or when I come back. 🙂 XO
I think it’s time for an afternoon NAP/meditation ! ! ! XOXOXO
Yes, Dvora! It is a good time for that. XOXO
This is so refreshing and I COMPLETELY relate. Maybe not on the children/parenting level (yet), but I do on the blogger/influencer/overwhelmed with stuff level. It’s so tough. I oftentimes daydream about what my life would be like right now without all of this. Or what it used to be like… Thing is, it is a passion, but it’s SO hard to juggle it all sometimes. I get it. Love your heart and candidness. Family, personal health and meaningful relationships are FAR more important! With you 100%!
I love you so! That won’t ever change, even with the Oreo-snacking habits… 😛
HA, Sammie, all closet Oreo-snacking is safe with me. LOL! I bet you do relate. You’re right though that when we are doing something that we love, it is easy to allow it to take over other parts of our lives that need our time and attention too. I think that’s how things started slipping and you know what happens once you have that one, sweet little delicious cookie, right? You turn into a cookie monster. Chomp! At least, I do. Thank you for being there for me and for your ongoing support throughout my snacking habits. XO
Thanks for sharing this! Sometimes it’s easy to get convinced by social media feeds (even our own!) that life isn’t always pretty or easy. Sometimes it’s overwhelming and scary and exhausting. But your honesty is why your readers love you and no matter what you post or how often you post, we’ll be here. Thanks for being you!
Thank you so much, Alyse. That means so much to me and it feels great to know that we’re in this together! It helped writing about my nuttiness and how out of sync I’ve been. Once I did, I felt like I could release some of that stress and pressure. XO
Something that will clear your head right away: trash all your emails (you can always retrieve them from your deleted folder LOL). Turn off all notifications on your phone and hire an intern who is willing to lend a helping hand in taking pictures and organizing products in exchange for some free product 🙂
What a concept: trashing all emails. Did you do it, Claudia? I can do it with some of my boxes like Promotions or Updates, but not sure I could handle seeing my Priority box emptied entirely. It may take longer to dig them up again. I don’t receive any pings or dings from social, so that’s a start, right? Thanks for all your suggestions! Definitely a work in progress. 🙂
Amen to that Sista! PS – Oreos are my kryptonite, Lol. I’ve upgraded to Newman’s O’s to make myself feel better about my life decisions though! Haha. #YOLO XO ❤️
LOL! They are delish. We like Newman’s O’s too (we’re not that picky about our treats 😉 ). Thanks for chiming in and helping a sista out, Danielle. XO
I’m there with you, sister! Full-time mama, marketer, now blogger, and officially, masochist. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you, however, that all your efforts are so profoundly appreciated. You make lipstick more than a product – it’s self-care, it’s ritual, it’s birthright. I love reading you because your work has meaning and you do everything for the right reasons – so if you need a break (or re-alignment), I’m sure that is also for the right reasons. Much love!